Week 10- More of my life and, oh ya, a wedding and some other shit.

Hello out there!!! How are you?!

 ...OK, ....NOW BACK TO ME!!....This blog writing thing is a bit narcissistic if you think about it. Like anyone really gives a shit about my weekly routine, and my struggles and my married life, but then again you're the people who watch The Kardashians, and I'm a little like that. Well....except for the mass amounts of money, big houses, nice clothes, several assistants, and trips to Greece. But let's face it, I'm probably more entertaining.

This week for me was pretty succesful! I got back on track from being sick and logged all of my calories per day. I managed to walk 3 miles to the grocery store and back while lugging my dog and child. I even got a dirty whistle from some pedophile van, but I'll take what I can get at this point.

I've switched up my food a bit and I'm focusing on eating "cleaner"....I realize that carb depleting is in my future, so I'm still trying to enjoy the occasional eggo waffle with a tablespoon of peanut butter and half of a banana, but then Geoff reminds me that frozen food is shit even if I log the 80 calories for the waffle. To which I reply, "not fucking fair". To which he gives me a look like, "you wanted to do this". So, I kicked the eggo waffle out and replaced it with oatmeal or rice cakes or Jamie Eason's Carrot Cake Protein Bars, which are amazing and you should Google, and if you happen to watch her video or see her picture, you,  A) may have the motivation you need to walk out the door and go to the gym before making those bars or B) gorge yourself with pizza because life has been so unfair to everyone but her....clearly.
 (Note: after proof reading this to Geoff, he said Jamie Eason had breast cancer soooo I take it back :/)

In case you're wondering, kale is my new favorite thing. I've been making lots of fun salads full of quinoa, chicken, nuts, grated parmesan, and veggies. Geoff laughs when he looks over at me while making my kale salads and asks, "what are you doing?" I then tell him, "I'm massaging the kale." But seriously, you have to! You have to take a tablespoon of olive oil and rub it into the kale leaves, otherwise it's like a crunchy weed.

I've upped my cardio this week per my slave driver husband, and this is what it looks like:

4 days Train Insane classes
3 days rowing 5 minutes as fast as possible
3 days of 30 minute running or cycling
(then die, barf, cry)

On a lighter, sweeter note, Geoff's cousin got married this last Saturday and I managed to squeeze my bod into a size small Forever 21 dress and rock very high heels, which I haven't worn since before I got pregnant for obvious reasons. My husband was adorable in his seersucker suit and between his outfit and my fake diamonds and tangerine lipstick with big lashes we looked like that douche couple from Miami...but we rocked it.

We sat at a table that I'm pretty sure had every old person over the age of 75, but just so you know, that's a really amazing thing. They are FULL of compliments.They all wished they were young again living vicariously through us, asking questions about our lives and wanting to see pictures of Colton....One of the ladies at the table said to me, " You know who you look like?...that girl from Mad Men....January Jones!"...well, hot damn lady, I'll take it!

Now, I'm gonna confess and say that I didn't pack tupperware at this wedding. I had pre-ordered the chicken because I thought I may not be able to eat the sides, but, if I know wedding food there's at least a salad with no dressing that I can add my chicken to and worst case I'll eat a bread roll with the chicken if the salad has dressing and My Fitness Pal can guesstimate the calories. I mean, it's one night......
Well..........it was a complete fail because the chicken came breaded and everything I had planned in my mind went wrong! My husband saw I may cry, so him being selfless (or afraid of a possible breakdown) gave me his steak, which I then added to the salad dressing- free salad and I was WINNING ;)

 Note to self: Be prepared wherever I go, because I don't know shit.

Moving on, I'm learning new things everyday about food and my body. For example, I found getting rid of the Luna bar I was eating per day really made a difference in my weight loss. I think it's a better choice than Carls Jr, but there is definitely something to eating cleaner foods in their natural state. This new week I'm cutting out dairy to see how I feel. It really is a process of elimination and seeing what works and what doesn't. I now have a cooler in the back of my car full of drinks and food so when I'm running errands I just open my trunk and tailgate....I have no shame....people look at me like I'm nuts, but hey, if the end of the world comes you'll wanna be in my car...just sayin.

Lastly, I wanna give a quick shout out to my sister Leah, who is trying this eating cleaner thing and prepping her food on Sundays. Her week was super successful because she planned it all out. Now, shes a single mom with a very diva-ish 4 year old who leaves for work in the early morning and shleps her kid to school while she puts in a good 10 hours before she gets home. She is the sole provider for her and her daughter because she decided to have sex with a man who doesn't like to work and pay, but that's a story for another day. Point is, she is JUST as busy as you ...so get it done.

Oh, and I ate a few Kettle chips on Sunday and our friend David asked me, " Are you gonna blog that you ate that?" So since I'm real and David's a dick, I'm blogging that I ate a few chips (but I did include them in my calorie total thank you very much). So, now you all know I'm imperfect, however, David, if you're reading this, I'm telling Kayla to ban all sexual favors.

Good night my friends,

Insane Bikini Momma